The Great Fat Indian Wedding

What according to you is India's national passion? What's the thing that completely surrounds an Indian's life - Cricket, Cinema? No! It is 'MARRIAGE'. 

From the day a baby is born, be it a boy or a girl, the plans for a grand wedding commence. Parents start gathering money not for good education of their children but for a Great Fat Indian Wedding. Marriage an event of great cultural and social importance is now a mere a cycle of feasts and exchange of gifts in one’s own family as well as between bride’s and the groom’s family. Dowry, lots of food wastage, and oodles of showoff are some key features of Indian Wedding these days. Traditional customs witness a more modern form which is more or less a mere formality. 

The week long extravaganza, or rather 'marriages' involve lot of ceremonies and a hell lot of money. Lavish meals, Flowers, Lighting, Dresses, Jewellery- every detail thing makes marriage more of a marketplace in India. The growing stature of showoff in marriages has made it increasingly difficult for the middleclass to conduct this social gathering. Enormous amount of food is wasted in marriages. This only adds to my pain, because a lot of people die due to starvation the same night; but hey, who cares?

Audi, BMW, Mercedes are the key spotlights, which make marriages more of a business deal. More the number of brands involved in a marriage, more it will be talked about in the society. For the people getting married, it is union of the two souls and celebration of the moment. But for the others it is an occasion to dress-up , show off your jewellery, family get-together, feasting (dieting is a sin during marriages), and what not! For kids, it is an occasion to meet lots of other kids and play around when the elders are busy with the customs/rituals. For the event management companies, the mandap owners, the flower seller, even the pujari and the likes, it is a grand business opportunity. 

Bridal wear and Bridal jewellery collection is another story altogether. At times bride’s parents may end up spending all their life's savings trying to repay the loan taken for their darling daughter’s marriage. That is, obviously, when they can afford to get one. Else their daughters might end up being single, or worse, agree to anybody who is ready to marry them. On a long term this also leads to other social evils like 'female foeticide or infanticide' in rural areas. 

Moreover, the thing which bothers me to a great deal is the decreasing importance of the marital relationship. Divorce cases have risen significantly, and who else but the society is to be blamed for that. Beautiful and expensive jewellery can't really define the longevity of the relation, and hence, more emphasis should be laid on finding the right match based on character, not in terms of money.

I believed as people become more educated and progressive, they will begin to see the absurdity of spending somebody’s lifetime savings for a single dress and occasion. On the contrary, educated people prefer this all the more! The few weddings of wealthy Indians (who get all the media attention) seem to have masked the inability of the other lesser mortals to hold such spectacular weddings. Well, I just hope better sense prevails and the big fat Indian Wedding doesn’t actually become a hindrance for others. 

Marriage always must be the union of two souls who make a lifetime commitment, rather than a huge crowd applauding the great arrangements by the hosts.

I would end here, hoping that the next time I visit a marriage, the bride and groom will appeal more to me more than the mandap.

Pulkit Garg

Y15 Undergraduate, The LNMIIT

PS: Selected as Winning Entry- October '15.